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EB
EB AKA Woolie James AKA General Cumtally Ballsiogot is a lazy pizza eating pot head that sits around watches porn all day. He currently resides in Blackyville, NC. History EB was born in Chair City, North Carolina sometime in the early 1990's (unclear when) to a group of traveling gypsy octopuses. He escaped from his birth parents and found refuge with a family down the street... literally like two houses down, his real parents saw him all the time bullying and vandalizing shit with his older "brother" Jared (a day walker). By middle school he became a chubby little retard and was super gay, nobody liked him. In high school he lost all his chub and became cool and often hung out with his no good degenerate friend; Alfonzo. After brief peroid of time of being in the Latin Kings he decided to turn his life around. By constantly drinking and never managing to keep a steady job his life suddenly became better somehow; or maybe he is just too drunk to remember how much better things were while he was with Alfonzo. Now he spends most of his time hanging out with his friends at weird hours of the night and early morning and chatting with his (faggot) e-friends. He also takes his dog for bi-daily walks around the continental United States, making sure to visit all national parks in one walk. EB sometimes forces his stupid girlfriend to get him groceries and fuck up the order; he just wanted some goddamn garlic and parmesan pita chips now I... erm I mean EB has to settle for sea salt! Can you believe that shit? Sea salt? C'mon... Oh sorry, where was I? EB, right. He is super cool and has the sex drive of James Dean (the pornstar not the fucking actor). Yeah, you'll never meet a cooler guy. Everybody else is gay. Likes *Sex with women *Sex with men *Sex *Pizza *Weed *Jack Daniels *Cocaine *Vests *Beating up homeless men *Starting underground fight clubs with hobos *Hobo sex *Eating cake off of his girlfriends breasts *Being a thin-sucked dewberry. *WILD CARD MOTHER FUCKERS *Bad bitches (got a fucking problem) *Cumfarts *Especially cumfarts *THIS CUMFART'S FOR WILD BILL Dislikes *Women *Men *People *Everything *Being too cool (really, its a curse) *Having to feed Lappet *Listening to his girlfriend *Talking to his girlfriend *His girlfriend *Women *Higgey *Fat people *His friends *Shiggy Education He is from the south, making him ineligible to continue his education past 6th grade. Occupation He gets fired very often. Literature Experience Holes. Gallery of EB Url.jpg|An older EB DXRLio4.jpg|A younger EB Andrews.jpg|From left to right: EB, Billy, Cartman. (Lappet was in the bathroom while this pic was taken) Generalballsiogot.jpg Category:Egyptian Pharoahs Category:Quesadilla tray with corndog and season fries with coke to drink Category:Quesadilla tray with corndog and season fires with coke to drink Category:I love bad bitches Category:Got some fucking problems Category:Yeah i love bad bitches Category:Blue moon Category:Now im now longer alone Category:Two Chainz Category:Frank sinatras son Category:Pimp Category:Cool person Category:Watercooler Category:Kendrick Lemar Category:Pokemon master Category:Haahahahahahahahah Category:Weed Category:Dank Category:Dro Category:Bud Category:Heads Category:Doesnt smoke reggie Category:Templates Category:Blog posts Category:I Want More Badges Category:King of the wiki